Sometimes, I like being a girl. Sometimes, when I am caught in traffic I appreciate the fact that I can shamelessly make googly eyes at a guy and he’ll let me in the fast lane – because I’m a girl. Also, I have road rage.
You see, today I was cruisin’ in my tricked out 1999 Tahoe – my personal up-yours to the environment – young, wild, and carefree. All was right with the world, and then BAM! Traffic was at a dead-stop on the interstate.
Enter: Mr. Mitsubishi Man.
I, along with 20 of my closest friends were trying to merge into stopped traffic; good times I tell ya’. At this point, everyone is moving at the blistering rate of 1.333 mph. I. kid. you. not. I really did calculate it. Clearly, allowing 1 person to merge in front of you will really kill your chances of making it anywhere on time, or so thought Mr. Mitsubishi Man. He tailgated the bumper of the guy in front of him literally inches away, speeding up then slamming on his brakes so that no one could get in front of him. At this point I may or may not have let an explicative escape from my mouth. Then I called down curses on him that would make King David proud.
Obviously, this is an injustice worth righting. Each time my lane inched past Mr. Mitsubishi Man I smugly grinned in self-satisfaction. Mr. Mitsubishi Man and I had a nice long HOUR drive over a mile and a half during which (about 20 minutes in) I realized a few things:
1. I have road rage. bad. I mean, I was raging before I even got off the on-ramp.
2. My heart is seriously jacked up. Thoughts crossed through my mind that are not fit for print. In fact, it is so jacked up that I can go from cheery to rage in about .34235 seconds. You’d think being as awesome as I am (see points 3 and 4 below) that I would be able to hide these things better, but alas, that is not the case.
3. I’m super prideful. Naturally, because I allowed 1 car (1 car and 1 car only, mind you – don’t go trying to double dip on my generosity people) into my lane I was oh so much better than Mr. Mitsubishi Man. Seriously, I was pretty sure that Jesus would be in my passenger seat cheering me on with a big thumbs-up. Kudos if you just resisted the “Jesus take the wheel” comment I know you wanted to make.
4. I’m still struggling with the same sins that I did when I was 6. I actually thought I wasn’t “that bad” and if I wanted to be perfect, I could totally do it. Cue lightening bolts. Funny how it is the little things, like traffic, that usually do me in.
5. I’m super thankful for grace and mercy because I need a whole stinking lot every single day. I’m also thankful that I don’t have an “I love Jesus” sticker on my car or anything equally horrific because if I didn’t believe in a totally sovereign God who is bigger than my mistakes and successes then I’m pretty sure half of Greenville county would not love Jesus because of me and my road rage.
So yeah, I’ve had this blog for less than a year and I already feel like we keep coming back to the same things: as a person, I suck; as a savior, Jesus is awesome.